Yourboyblue's Blog

Well, this is, after all, in part, a video games blog (I think) and I should, at some point, talk about video games. So, having used so many commas in the previous sentence, you’d think it was the only key I had on my keyboard and stuck for ideas, I turned to my muse for some suggestions. A great one she gave was “Ten things that a video game should have”. So, thanks to Anateboteo (gazastripclub.wordpress.com) and let’s do this! So here you have it: Ten Ingredients to Make your Video Game Awesome.

1) Something New: Even more so these days, this is becoming a hot topic. New IPs (Intellectual Property) is steadily proving to be the way to succeed in video gaming. Case in point, an incredible game (albeit on the PS3) called Little Big Planet. From the amazing introduction, until you set the controller down (which, thanks to the insane amount of user-generated content out there, you won’t do ever) this game is fantastic. Taking the platformer genre to new (metaphorical) heights, LBP has captured the hearts and imaginations of millions of people, adults and children alike. Yes, new and fresh ideas are becoming more and more desirable every day. Even tried-and-tested formulas like Call of Duty are adding something new to their mixes. For example, COD4 brought modern warfare to the game and is still one of every gamer’s top ten games out there. COD5 did the same thing by giving the old and (let’s face it people) staled-out setting of WWII a new twist by putting you on the beaches of Japan, a highly underrated and often brushed-aside WWII scene.

So, developers, give me something new!

2) Long playability: When a game is so long that you almost…ALMOST… get sick of it and yet you can’t put it down, that’s a game that’s worth my hard-earned cash! The general mantra is: If it’s good, it’s short. At least, that’s what I thought when I played my first game ever on my XBOX360 – Bioshock. Bioshock is easily one of the best games of all time as many will tell you. It also features an incredible campaign that can take even the most hardcore gamer up to 4 days to finish (for all you newbies out there, that’s a long time). It’s also well structured in that it’s not an open world game where you can just keep going around for hours doing nothing. The main (and really, only) campaign takes around 20 hours to complete. I remember playing Bioshock and thinking “wow, this is amazing! And the story is great to boot! Too bad it’s going to end soon.” I was never so happy to be wrong. This brings us to numbers three and four on the list.

3) Surprise me: Ask yourselves “What would a gamer expect to see here?” and then do something completely different. Case in point: Half Life. Yes, the original Half Life would surprise you in so many ways that you couldn’t help but feel like a complete dingus. The first time you see a rope dangling in front of you, you hear a voice whisper “climb it”. Happily, you drudge along, hoping that this rope will take you to goodies and weapons. But what’s this? I’m not climbing up the rope, the rope is pulling ME up! Then, you look up only to find the maw of  a Barnacle eagerly awaiting your tasty flesh. You scream and fire madly into the air only to hear the beeeeeep of your biometrics and know that you. have. just. been. punk’d.

4) Have a great story: Yes, this isn’t porn. Here, the story matters. I want plot twists, characters I can relate to, maybe even a little love story. I don’t just want to shoot stuff, I want to play in an interactive movie, I want to BE the space commander that visits foreign planets and gives a crap about why I’m doing it. I want to be immersed, damn it! Hire some good writers (I hear they accept peanuts (yes, ACTUAL peanuts) as payment) and get crackin’!

5) Focus: Having a great story is good, in fact, it’s quite essential. There are, however, exceptions to every rule. Sometimes, I just want to play a video game. Case in point: Dead Rising. Hells Yes! Not only does it have zombies, it’s just a meaningless game where you just walk around a mall and beat the crap out of mindless zombies with anything (and when they said anything, they meant ANYTHING) you can find. If there was a story there, it escaped me. - Edit: I’ve been told by a friend that Dead Rising actually has a great story and that I must replay it. My point here is, while it’ll be really cool to have flight simulator/shoot ‘em up/ car racing/ Leisure Suit Larry-esque video game, it also means that you more than likely not do any one of those things well. Pick a genre, pick a theme, know what you want to do and do it! Scope creep is a bitch.

6) Hot chicks: Yea, sorry about this one ladies, but it’s true. Case in point: Dead or Alive: Xtreme Beach Volleyball. 11 Million copies sold in Japan alone in the first 11 weeks. Also, Tomb Raider. Yes, it’s a good game, but c’mon guys. I mean, come on. ‘Nuff said.

7) Replayability: Give me a game that I want (not can, HUGE difference) play over and over again. I present to you, Diablo 2. Randomly generated levels, such that you will never, EVER play the same level twice. The environments change, the item drops change, even the enemies change. Oh, what’s that? You beat it already? Well, you can play it again on a harder difficulty setting and get even more ‘leet gear for your Sorceress or Barbarian! AND, when you’re done with that, you can play it AGAIN, on a harder difficulty setting. AND, if you beat it on nightmare, well, then I’m sorry you need to go out more cuz that shit is hardcorez.

8 ) Options: It’s all well and good to have me play a video game the way you want me to, but if you’re going to do that, you have to do it juuuuust right. That means don’t let me know you’re not giving me an option, don’t let me realize it’s the only option, let me just WANT to do it that way. Quite frankly, that is very hard to do. So, as a result, I want options. Alternate endings are great and all, but I’m talking about more concrete stuff. I want secondary fire modes on my weapons, I want LOTS of weapons (but still well-balanced – sorry, gamers are a finicky bunch) I want alternate routes and I want to play the game, not have the game play me. We always get promised these open-ended games where you can beat a mission any way you want (Yes, Peter Molyneux, I’m talking about you) and that we can do anything we please. Realistically, it just boils down to one or two options (e.g. kill the guy, or don’t). Bleh. I want ramifications for my actions that extend far far beyond their occurence. I want to feel like I have a choice and not like I’m pushed into doing something. Take Oblivion for example, the more I use a skill, the better at it I get. I like that! If I want to use the bow and arrow, I will naturally start to inflict more pwnage with it as my skills increase! I don’t get better at Halo just by reading a book! Or by magically having a sudden growth spurt! I play and practice and practice and I slowly get better! Give me options. Whether it’s in how I progress through the game, how I end the game, how I play the game or even how and when I use my guns. I want choices! 32 flavours of carrnege, baby! Which brings us to number nine.

9) Gore: Not a necessity but if you’re game to make a violent video game, do it right! Now, I’m a pacifist by nature, but there is nothing more I enjoy seeing while playing a video game than blood, guts and gore. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t approve of violence, but in video games, well, it’s fucking cool! Take Mortal Kombat (with a freaking K) vs DC Universe for example. By making the game rated teen, Midway was hoping to appeal to a wider market (hardcore MK people in their thirties now will buy the game because it’s MK and current teens will become tomorrow’s thirty year old bachelors living in their parents’ basements). This, however, was a total flop. The game sold poorly and, if you ask me, is pants! I want to have SubZero grab his opponent’s skull and rip it from his torso! I want that when Scorpion burns you alive, you scream as though you were being…ohhhh, I don’t know…. BURNED ALIVE?!?! Sheesh. What’s up with the flames and then a slight whimper followed by a pile of bones hitting the ground! Other fighting games do the combo/punch/timing/actual fighting thing waaaay better than you do, so don’t try and pretend that you’re anything more than cool super moves and fatalities. For shame Ed Boon, for shame…

10) Make it fun: I want to be entertained. It’s great that you have super shader anti-aliasing technology on your piece of crap game, but it’s still a piece of crap. I want to have fun. I mean, some of the most complex games I’ve played can still be super duper fun, but I will take a good old Super Mario over many of the uber pretty graphics that are coming out now. I want to be entertained! It’s a simple concept. Make me enjoy picking up your game, make me WANT to play it, make me smile, make me go “ohhhh, awesome!” but don’t just make me go “oh wow, that’s pretty”. Seriously guys, looks are not everything, didn’t your mamas ever tell you that?

Ok, I know I said ten but, just one more…

11) LISTEN: When reviewers write you a bad review, don’t just be sad about it, LISTEN to what they say! Create and READ your forums, listen to what the gaming community tells you! Crytek heard everything people had to say about Crysis and then came back with an expansion that many til this day call better than Crysis. I mean, crap man! It looks better than Crysis! That’s like the benchmark of ultimate gorgeousness! BUT, it runs better too! Spore was great but not nearly what we were promised. Now, Maxis listened to people’s complaints and are releasing Galactic Adventures (which should be awesome). So please guys, LISTEN to what we have to say, we know what we’re talking about.

Ok? There you have it. Do these ten (er.. eleven) things and you are almost guaranteed an awesome video game. Yalla, go!